The Gift From Hell, Literally

Everyone gets one or two "taste-challenged" gifts during the holidays from well meaning gift givers who do not know any better. You smile and say "how nice" and then start mentally planning your efforts to be rid of it. But how about when you are given a gift that the giver knows you will not like?

Anyone who knows me well knows one quirk about me - I hate clowns. I hate all kinds of clowns. I hate happy clowns, sad clowns, but most importantly, I hate EVIL clowns. But then, they are all evil, with plans on eating us alive, aren't they? Even the word "clown" sends shivers down my spine. Once their true nature was finally exposed in "Poltergeist" and Steven King's "It", I knew my fears were real, and justified.

So, armed with that knowledge, what does the partner present me with on Christmas Eve? A giant Clown Pez dispenser, about 14 inches high. And it is spectacularly evil looking - see for yourself:



Even the Bird will not get near it - I tried to introduce them, but the Bird flew away (which given his wings are clipped, was really not his best decision this week).

This one part of a much larger plan. I get clown paraphanelia for Christmas from him every year - usually a refrigerator magnet or a silly key chain - always a stocking stuffer, always something disposed of quickly by me. Of course, the partner finds all of this extremely amusing. I find it to be...

The Gift From Hell