Is there a funnier word than 'mammaries'? The partner and I were watching "The Aviator" (which is a great movie, a must see) and there is this really well done scene where the Howard Hughes character played by Leonardo di Caprio (proving again the amazing range of his talent) is forced to defend the overexposure of "mammaries" in one of his movies starring Jane Bryant (yes, THAT Jane Bryant).
The scene is very amusing, with accusations of indecency flying. There is mention of photos to demonstrate and suddenly I am all, "did they show breasts in movies during the 30's and 40's?" when suddenly the pictures are put up and basically, we see the mammaries behind a blouse. A fairly conservative one by today's standards. Now, assuming these events actually took place, given that this is based on the real life of Howard Hughes, this scene takes on massive comic undertones, and is brilliantly played.
Although I am not sure how many times the word "mammaries" was used during the scene, it had to be at least 30 - once Hughes starts comparing Bryant's mammaries with other large-mammaried actresses of the time. The word "breast" was never mentioned - God forbid.
Anyway, my immature side was tickled by this scene.
Thursday, December 29, 2005
The Common Cold vs. "Intelligent Design"
I am getting over a really awful cold, the kind that hits hard, with little warning and then passes just as quickly. I probably caught from all the intimate embraces with family over four days of family holiday gatherings. Whenever I catch a cold, it is always the same - I feel a sore throat, then the next day, complete misery and then the day after that much better (today). During the height of it yesterday, between hacking coughs and blowing the nose, I pondered just how it is that a microscopic whatever can make me feel so sick.
And then I remembered the debate about "Intelligent Design". You know, I understand why some people feel the need to justify evolution in a religious sense. Their brains are telling them that science and evolution make sense, but they cannot give up on the Bible. They feel that in order for such a complex system of materials and life to have been created, an "intelligent force" had to be behind it.
The reality is they just cannot grasp the concept that life on Earth may just be one massive accident, a massive collision of the right ingredients coming together at the right place and the right time. Personally, I believe that this "accident" actually has happened in other parts of the universe, and is probably more common that Intelligent Design enthusiasts care to believe.
An interesting counter theory was put forth by Professor Don Wise of the University of Massachusetts at Amherst (my alma mater). See his interview about "Incompetent Design". He says that no competent engineer would have used the existing design of the human body, it is just too inefficient. If there was indeed a "greater force" behind the creation of life and the universe, that force would be incompetent, not intelligent.
If there was an "intelligent" force behind our design, would a microscopic bug cause us so much anguish?
I don't think so.
And then I remembered the debate about "Intelligent Design". You know, I understand why some people feel the need to justify evolution in a religious sense. Their brains are telling them that science and evolution make sense, but they cannot give up on the Bible. They feel that in order for such a complex system of materials and life to have been created, an "intelligent force" had to be behind it.
The reality is they just cannot grasp the concept that life on Earth may just be one massive accident, a massive collision of the right ingredients coming together at the right place and the right time. Personally, I believe that this "accident" actually has happened in other parts of the universe, and is probably more common that Intelligent Design enthusiasts care to believe.
An interesting counter theory was put forth by Professor Don Wise of the University of Massachusetts at Amherst (my alma mater). See his interview about "Incompetent Design". He says that no competent engineer would have used the existing design of the human body, it is just too inefficient. If there was indeed a "greater force" behind the creation of life and the universe, that force would be incompetent, not intelligent.
If there was an "intelligent" force behind our design, would a microscopic bug cause us so much anguish?
I don't think so.
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
Are there Gay Klingons?
If you are a Star Trek follower, then like me, you have wrestled with the following question - "Are there Gay Klingons?".
A Klingon "Biker Bear"?
The Klingons are a mighty warrior race, proud and driven by honor and valor in battle. They also love wine (blood wine, but wine none the less), dress up like leather drag queens and do not allow females on the High Council (interesting). They love Opera, and quote Shakespeare.
The bowels of their capital city are the perfect seedy areas where you would have found any American gay bar in the 70s and 80s. And every secret rendezvous arranged on their home planet of Kronos always happens in these areas (again, interesting).
When female Klingons do force their ways into positions of power, they are almost always bull-dykey:
Despite their menacing ways, the males are often very thoughtful, with genuine affection for the persons (read male) they respect. And their space craft are always very tidy and orderly.
I believe there must be Gay and Lesbian Klingons. They may need to stay underground, but I am sure they exist (and probably have fabulous parties).
Q'apla!!
A Klingon "Biker Bear"?
The Klingons are a mighty warrior race, proud and driven by honor and valor in battle. They also love wine (blood wine, but wine none the less), dress up like leather drag queens and do not allow females on the High Council (interesting). They love Opera, and quote Shakespeare.
The bowels of their capital city are the perfect seedy areas where you would have found any American gay bar in the 70s and 80s. And every secret rendezvous arranged on their home planet of Kronos always happens in these areas (again, interesting).
When female Klingons do force their ways into positions of power, they are almost always bull-dykey:
Despite their menacing ways, the males are often very thoughtful, with genuine affection for the persons (read male) they respect. And their space craft are always very tidy and orderly.
I believe there must be Gay and Lesbian Klingons. They may need to stay underground, but I am sure they exist (and probably have fabulous parties).
Q'apla!!
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Open Letter to the National Security Agency
Dear National Security Agency,
I have read in the newspaper that you may be monitoring my blog, email, phone calls, social activities and credit card purchases.
Welcome. I hope you enjoy your visit.
Love,
Jack
I have read in the newspaper that you may be monitoring my blog, email, phone calls, social activities and credit card purchases.
Welcome. I hope you enjoy your visit.
Love,
Jack
Monday, December 26, 2005
The Gift From Hell, Literally
Everyone gets one or two "taste-challenged" gifts during the holidays from well meaning gift givers who do not know any better. You smile and say "how nice" and then start mentally planning your efforts to be rid of it. But how about when you are given a gift that the giver knows you will not like?
Anyone who knows me well knows one quirk about me - I hate clowns. I hate all kinds of clowns. I hate happy clowns, sad clowns, but most importantly, I hate EVIL clowns. But then, they are all evil, with plans on eating us alive, aren't they? Even the word "clown" sends shivers down my spine. Once their true nature was finally exposed in "Poltergeist" and Steven King's "It", I knew my fears were real, and justified.
So, armed with that knowledge, what does the partner present me with on Christmas Eve? A giant Clown Pez dispenser, about 14 inches high. And it is spectacularly evil looking - see for yourself:
Even the Bird will not get near it - I tried to introduce them, but the Bird flew away (which given his wings are clipped, was really not his best decision this week).
This one part of a much larger plan. I get clown paraphanelia for Christmas from him every year - usually a refrigerator magnet or a silly key chain - always a stocking stuffer, always something disposed of quickly by me. Of course, the partner finds all of this extremely amusing. I find it to be...
The Gift From Hell
Anyone who knows me well knows one quirk about me - I hate clowns. I hate all kinds of clowns. I hate happy clowns, sad clowns, but most importantly, I hate EVIL clowns. But then, they are all evil, with plans on eating us alive, aren't they? Even the word "clown" sends shivers down my spine. Once their true nature was finally exposed in "Poltergeist" and Steven King's "It", I knew my fears were real, and justified.
So, armed with that knowledge, what does the partner present me with on Christmas Eve? A giant Clown Pez dispenser, about 14 inches high. And it is spectacularly evil looking - see for yourself:
Even the Bird will not get near it - I tried to introduce them, but the Bird flew away (which given his wings are clipped, was really not his best decision this week).
This one part of a much larger plan. I get clown paraphanelia for Christmas from him every year - usually a refrigerator magnet or a silly key chain - always a stocking stuffer, always something disposed of quickly by me. Of course, the partner finds all of this extremely amusing. I find it to be...
The Gift From Hell
Sunday, December 25, 2005
Are the Harry Potter movie actors getting too old?
There were so many important topics that could have been discussed at my family's holiday dinner table this weekend. Topics of importance that range from the effects of the various disasters of 2005 (tsunami, Katrina), to federal incompetence and general Boobery (Bush administration), to criminal politicians (Frist, Rove, Delay, Bush, Cheney), to the war in Iraq.
Yes, all of these topics were available for debate and discussion. But what really seemed to be bothering everyone the most, and at both ends of the debate was the ever important question, "Are the actors playing Harry, Ron and Hermione getting too old in the Harry Potter movies and should they be replaced?"
Man. The debate raged. One brother feels they are too old and look it. I argued that the actors playing high school kids on "The OC", "Beverly Hills 90210" and "That 70s Show" are all my age. Another brother believes it will all be done by special effects anyway, and that anyone can be any age these days.
We know what is important.
Yes, all of these topics were available for debate and discussion. But what really seemed to be bothering everyone the most, and at both ends of the debate was the ever important question, "Are the actors playing Harry, Ron and Hermione getting too old in the Harry Potter movies and should they be replaced?"
Man. The debate raged. One brother feels they are too old and look it. I argued that the actors playing high school kids on "The OC", "Beverly Hills 90210" and "That 70s Show" are all my age. Another brother believes it will all be done by special effects anyway, and that anyone can be any age these days.
We know what is important.
Friday, December 23, 2005
The Manger
I was thinking about the Nativity scene today, and about the Manger in particular when it occurred to me that I was not entirely certain what a Manger actually was. All I knew about it is that 1) it is found in a stable and 2) Baby Jesus was put into one following his birth. So I decided to look it up and this is what I learned:
Nice. So the savior of humanity was born in a stable and then put into the animal food. When you think about it, there must have been a better place to have this baby. True, the inn was all full and Bethlehem was overrun with people on that particular night (or so the Bible says), but there must have been a park, or a tree to sit under? The Department of Social Services would be all over this.
When you look at Nativity scenes, it always appears that the lambs, cattle and camels all seem to be smiling at the manger, so who knows? Maybe some angel whispered in their ears about the "Son of God, and Host of Hosts, and so on". After all, if I was almighty and my virgin conceived son was about to be born in a stable, I probably would have sent some form of holy cleaning crew down to get the place in order and keep the animals in line.
But another thought comes to mind. Given all the recent discussion about how the Bible was manipulated by the Church, omitting some information and keeping other information, mostly to make Jesus seem so much larger than life (check "Da Vinci Code") - wouldn't the part about being laid in animal food have been changed?
Just a thought. Happy Holidays!
Manger: a container (usually in a barn or stable) from which cattle or horses feed.
Nice. So the savior of humanity was born in a stable and then put into the animal food. When you think about it, there must have been a better place to have this baby. True, the inn was all full and Bethlehem was overrun with people on that particular night (or so the Bible says), but there must have been a park, or a tree to sit under? The Department of Social Services would be all over this.
When you look at Nativity scenes, it always appears that the lambs, cattle and camels all seem to be smiling at the manger, so who knows? Maybe some angel whispered in their ears about the "Son of God, and Host of Hosts, and so on". After all, if I was almighty and my virgin conceived son was about to be born in a stable, I probably would have sent some form of holy cleaning crew down to get the place in order and keep the animals in line.
But another thought comes to mind. Given all the recent discussion about how the Bible was manipulated by the Church, omitting some information and keeping other information, mostly to make Jesus seem so much larger than life (check "Da Vinci Code") - wouldn't the part about being laid in animal food have been changed?
Just a thought. Happy Holidays!
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
Low Windshield Wiper Fluid Warning
Is this really necessary? I have a 2002 VW Jetta with pretty much all the normal options. I made sure that it had everything that I wanted - asking all the right questions to be sure I would be happy. One question did not occur to me though. That question was "Is there an unnecessary warning that will bellow so loudly and unexpectedly that I will pee my pants when it sounds?" I wish I had asked that question.
Granted, windshield wiper fluid is a good thing. At this time of year, it might even achieve "important" thing. But when you run out, you know. And unlike gasoline, when you run out, your car still functions. A light on the dash indicating "low" is good enough, the terrifying siren is over-doing the criticality of the event. In fact the whole thing is equivalent to the low gas light and alarm - and, sorry, the wiper fluid does not rank as high on the list of critical fluids as the gas.
On a semi-related note - when will they finally begin to make the windshield wiper fluid reservoir in your car the same size as the refill containers they sell at the store? I mean, what remains in the damned replacement after filling the reservoir almost seems pointless to store - it just ends up making all kinds of noise bouncing around the trunk, doesn't it? Is this one of those things like when the air filters of the command module and the L.E.M. did not match in the Apollo 13 disaster?
Granted, windshield wiper fluid is a good thing. At this time of year, it might even achieve "important" thing. But when you run out, you know. And unlike gasoline, when you run out, your car still functions. A light on the dash indicating "low" is good enough, the terrifying siren is over-doing the criticality of the event. In fact the whole thing is equivalent to the low gas light and alarm - and, sorry, the wiper fluid does not rank as high on the list of critical fluids as the gas.
On a semi-related note - when will they finally begin to make the windshield wiper fluid reservoir in your car the same size as the refill containers they sell at the store? I mean, what remains in the damned replacement after filling the reservoir almost seems pointless to store - it just ends up making all kinds of noise bouncing around the trunk, doesn't it? Is this one of those things like when the air filters of the command module and the L.E.M. did not match in the Apollo 13 disaster?
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Nemesis = School Bus
In the city of Boston, apparently there are school bus stops every fifty yards. For the children, this must be extremely convenient. For me, it is something else entirely. NEMESIS.
You know, when I was a kid, it seemed you had to walk half a mile just to get to a bus stop, if you were lucky enough to be inside a "bus zone". In fact, for a while because my family lived almost, but not quite 2 miles from the school, we had to walk the whole way to school.
But these days, kids do not have to walk at all. Some probably walk out the front door in the morning and say to themselves, "which one will I stand at today? The one 25 yards to my right, or the one 25 yards to my left?" Decisions, decisions.
I, though, face other choices regarding these school buses - do I get up extra early this morning so that my drive takes me only 40 minutes, or do I leave at a more decent time and plan on a 1.5 hour drive? Because if you get caught up in the sea of yellow at the beginning of their terror, you will be stuck good.
I am struggling to find a way out of my neighborhood and onto the highway that will avoid these masters of traffic nightmarity, but so far, it appears I am well surrounded.
You know, when I was a kid, it seemed you had to walk half a mile just to get to a bus stop, if you were lucky enough to be inside a "bus zone". In fact, for a while because my family lived almost, but not quite 2 miles from the school, we had to walk the whole way to school.
But these days, kids do not have to walk at all. Some probably walk out the front door in the morning and say to themselves, "which one will I stand at today? The one 25 yards to my right, or the one 25 yards to my left?" Decisions, decisions.
I, though, face other choices regarding these school buses - do I get up extra early this morning so that my drive takes me only 40 minutes, or do I leave at a more decent time and plan on a 1.5 hour drive? Because if you get caught up in the sea of yellow at the beginning of their terror, you will be stuck good.
I am struggling to find a way out of my neighborhood and onto the highway that will avoid these masters of traffic nightmarity, but so far, it appears I am well surrounded.
Monday, December 19, 2005
The Bird - Vocabulary Update
As mentioned in previous posts, the African Gray Parrot Rick, aka "The Bird" is an amazing talker - picking up all kinds of things to say, and knowing the appropriate times to say them (for example, saying "Good Morning" when you stumble out of bed to get coffee, but "good night" when you are turning out the lights to go to bed). African Gray Parrots are great talkers - one famous one named Alex has been featured on Nova and other documentaries about the subject - here is some more detailed info if you are interested.
But I wanted to update you on Rick's two new favorite statements:
"Hi Love" - this is a quick informal greeting, which he uses when you walk into the room and look at him in the eyes - he loves this new greeting - "Hello" has become boring to him, and "Hi" needed some sprucing, so he has chosen "Hi Love" and is saying it all the time (but only to me and the partner - others still get "Hello").
"Are You Okay?" - he has actually said this for a while, but it has recently replaced "How Are You?". He got this from a time when he accidentally flew against a window when startled and fell to the ground - I ran to him and picked him up caringly asking "are you ok?" to calm him down. Not long after that, he started saying it. But now he says it all the time. And he says it in a very caring tone.
Just a little more glimpse into the mind of the "Big Silly Bird" (another thing he says).
But I wanted to update you on Rick's two new favorite statements:
"Hi Love" - this is a quick informal greeting, which he uses when you walk into the room and look at him in the eyes - he loves this new greeting - "Hello" has become boring to him, and "Hi" needed some sprucing, so he has chosen "Hi Love" and is saying it all the time (but only to me and the partner - others still get "Hello").
"Are You Okay?" - he has actually said this for a while, but it has recently replaced "How Are You?". He got this from a time when he accidentally flew against a window when startled and fell to the ground - I ran to him and picked him up caringly asking "are you ok?" to calm him down. Not long after that, he started saying it. But now he says it all the time. And he says it in a very caring tone.
Just a little more glimpse into the mind of the "Big Silly Bird" (another thing he says).
Saturday, December 17, 2005
Joy to the World
Joy to the World..
My Shopping's done..
The Tree is Up and Lit..
Let Everyone, have some fun..
Because I am all done, because I am all done
Because I am - I am - I am all done
My Shopping's done..
The Tree is Up and Lit..
Let Everyone, have some fun..
Because I am all done, because I am all done
Because I am - I am - I am all done
Friday, December 16, 2005
Reverse Commute
Who the hell came up with this expression?
Recently I changed jobs. Everything about the change made sense: outstanding professional growth opportunity, exciting work environment, challenging job duties, interesting and fun co-workers and the ever important dramatic increase in compensation. There was just one questionable change - instead of the 2 mile subway ride to work every morning, I would be driving 25 miles.
Not that I have not commuted by car before - I have. In 1995/96, I even commuted 55 miles each way "against traffic". But it had been ten years, I was not prepared. But not to worry, I was told, I was going to be "reverse commuting" - you see, apparently if you live in the city and work in the suburbs, you do not have any commuting headaches. Huh!
In the time up to my first day, I eagerly prepared for my "reverse commute". I pranced giggling into the Mass Turnpike's "Fast Lane" office (known as "Speed Pass" everywhere else in the US) to finally belong to that elusive club of drivers who could drive right through the tolls. I cleaned out my car, and even filled the tank with gas. I was so excited for my new "reverse commute". I naively believed that I would gayly speed up 128 North from the Pike, looking at all those suckers sitting in traffic trying to get to Boston. NOT.
Instead, in one week I have experienced a snow storm, an ice storm, a "wide load" vehicle that smashed into a toll booth causing miles of endless backup (even for us special Fast Lane transponder holders).
If we, in New England, have a truly awful snowy horrid winter, you can rest assured that the reason will not be atmospheric, or planetary or meteorological in any way. It will just be fate - the fact that it is because this is when I chose to "reverse commute".
Love,
Jack
Recently I changed jobs. Everything about the change made sense: outstanding professional growth opportunity, exciting work environment, challenging job duties, interesting and fun co-workers and the ever important dramatic increase in compensation. There was just one questionable change - instead of the 2 mile subway ride to work every morning, I would be driving 25 miles.
Not that I have not commuted by car before - I have. In 1995/96, I even commuted 55 miles each way "against traffic". But it had been ten years, I was not prepared. But not to worry, I was told, I was going to be "reverse commuting" - you see, apparently if you live in the city and work in the suburbs, you do not have any commuting headaches. Huh!
In the time up to my first day, I eagerly prepared for my "reverse commute". I pranced giggling into the Mass Turnpike's "Fast Lane" office (known as "Speed Pass" everywhere else in the US) to finally belong to that elusive club of drivers who could drive right through the tolls. I cleaned out my car, and even filled the tank with gas. I was so excited for my new "reverse commute". I naively believed that I would gayly speed up 128 North from the Pike, looking at all those suckers sitting in traffic trying to get to Boston. NOT.
Instead, in one week I have experienced a snow storm, an ice storm, a "wide load" vehicle that smashed into a toll booth causing miles of endless backup (even for us special Fast Lane transponder holders).
If we, in New England, have a truly awful snowy horrid winter, you can rest assured that the reason will not be atmospheric, or planetary or meteorological in any way. It will just be fate - the fact that it is because this is when I chose to "reverse commute".
Love,
Jack
Worst. President. Ever.
There is no further need for debate. We now are living under the worst possible executive administration this nation has experienced in modern times. It claims to spread freedom, but is not interested in protecting it at home:
Read the story
I refuse to believe that this is not criminal in nature. Part of me yearns for him to resign, but then we would have to suffer the follies of Cheney, which would be no better.
We have three very dark years ahead of us. At least Congress appears to be getting its head clear:
Senate actually makes a good decision
Read the story
I refuse to believe that this is not criminal in nature. Part of me yearns for him to resign, but then we would have to suffer the follies of Cheney, which would be no better.
We have three very dark years ahead of us. At least Congress appears to be getting its head clear:
Senate actually makes a good decision
Thursday, December 15, 2005
Well this sucks, YET AGAIN!!!!
Oh crap - this is getting too familiar ....
This clearly seems to be setting a pattern. And I know exactly why. Because I just started a new job this week that requires that I drive 20 miles each way (this after ten years of commuting 2 miles, mostly by subway - by the way, you can expect a nice diatribe soon from me about the wonders of commuting, with photos - we don't fool around at What A Bird). I am also one of those staff people who must show during weather events. Therefore, Mother Nature has determined that my life must suck and is getting to it.
And it does not seem to show much promise for next week:
God damn it!
This clearly seems to be setting a pattern. And I know exactly why. Because I just started a new job this week that requires that I drive 20 miles each way (this after ten years of commuting 2 miles, mostly by subway - by the way, you can expect a nice diatribe soon from me about the wonders of commuting, with photos - we don't fool around at What A Bird). I am also one of those staff people who must show during weather events. Therefore, Mother Nature has determined that my life must suck and is getting to it.
And it does not seem to show much promise for next week:
God damn it!
Jerk of the Week
Mitt Romney, Governor of the Commonwealth.
Where do I start? This guy sucks. His administration sucks. What has he managed to do for this state? Sh^t, that's what. And guess what, he wants to be your President.
As for Massachusetts, he clearly does not care. Everything he does now is carefully staged to set a presidential run, not to be the leader of our state. As Andy Hiller of Channel 7 Boston says, his heart is not here, so let him go.
He is not running again for Governor. You might think I would give him a pass on Jerk of the Week for that reason. But, the problem is that he wants to go somewhere else, the White House, and we, the people of Massachusetts, were just his stepping stone.
Massachusetts has sent many people to the Presidential Election, some have won. Most of the time, Massachusetts supports its own in these elections. But if Romney were to somehow be the Republican nominee - MA will vote otherwise.
Where do I start? This guy sucks. His administration sucks. What has he managed to do for this state? Sh^t, that's what. And guess what, he wants to be your President.
As for Massachusetts, he clearly does not care. Everything he does now is carefully staged to set a presidential run, not to be the leader of our state. As Andy Hiller of Channel 7 Boston says, his heart is not here, so let him go.
He is not running again for Governor. You might think I would give him a pass on Jerk of the Week for that reason. But, the problem is that he wants to go somewhere else, the White House, and we, the people of Massachusetts, were just his stepping stone.
Massachusetts has sent many people to the Presidential Election, some have won. Most of the time, Massachusetts supports its own in these elections. But if Romney were to somehow be the Republican nominee - MA will vote otherwise.
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
Gym Jerk Continued
Total ass. All one of my readers might recall a post I made about proper Gym behavior in which I describe a gym bunny who believes he is somehow more special than everyone else. As in my previous post, which you can review here, he hogs the machines and ignores people who are waiting to use them, despite the incredibly polite signs indicating he must give up the machine between sets while others are working through. He sits on the machines between his sets, and reads People magazine, pretending no one else is there.
I am not sure what annoys me more - the fact I do not get the immediate access to the machine that I want, or the fact this ass believes it is OK to do this. Anyway, tonight I intervened. The conversation went something like this:
I am not sure what annoys me more - the fact I do not get the immediate access to the machine that I want, or the fact this ass believes it is OK to do this. Anyway, tonight I intervened. The conversation went something like this:
Me: (politely) Do you mind if I jump in and do a quick set?Fortunately for every prima donna like him, there are at least 20 cool guys who work within the guidelines and are very considerate.
The Ass: (sighs) Well I still have four to do.
Mind you, he did not specify what "four" meant - reps or sets? By the way, that is gym technobabble people rattle off to sound like they go to the gym often.
Me: (still politely) Well if you are doing four sets, do you mind if I go in during your rest between next two?
The Ass: (annoyed and not hiding it) Fine! Then he gets up - walks away without toweling off his sweaty ick.
Me: (under my breath) Ass...
Chilly?
The weather lady on the radio this morning on the way to work said that tonight we would experience a "chilly" 16 degrees.
Chilly?
Chilly!?
Chilly is a brisk April day, or the morning of the first frost in October. Chilly is the reception you get from your significant other when you stumble home from a night out alone at the clubs. Chilly is how I prefer my very large glasses of Chardonnay. But what Chilly is NOT is 16 degrees. 16 degrees is frickin COLD. Temps have long passed "chilly". Perhaps she was trying to make a funny. But if so, she failed. And to top it off, she was wrong anyway. Instead, we had a chilly 1 degree.
Bitch.
Chilly?
Chilly!?
Chilly is a brisk April day, or the morning of the first frost in October. Chilly is the reception you get from your significant other when you stumble home from a night out alone at the clubs. Chilly is how I prefer my very large glasses of Chardonnay. But what Chilly is NOT is 16 degrees. 16 degrees is frickin COLD. Temps have long passed "chilly". Perhaps she was trying to make a funny. But if so, she failed. And to top it off, she was wrong anyway. Instead, we had a chilly 1 degree.
Bitch.
Friday, December 09, 2005
Well, this sucks, again
Although we are only just starting the season, we have had TWO fairly decent snowstorms already! Crap. And I am just about to start long distance commuting every day again. This figures. The last time I had to long distance commute daily was during the winter of 1996, when it snowed practically every freaking day.
Oh well, at least it is nice for the holiday season. But I really could have done without the thunder and lightning - that was sort of strange for a howling snow storm.
Thursday, December 08, 2005
"Shower"
UPDATED 12/8 with pics......
Ok, so it has been a while since I wrote about "the Bird". But here is a cute story.
Last night, "the partner" decided that the Bird needed a shower. He decided this because Rick has this habit of going for a bath in his water bowl and making a real mess. The bird loves to get wet and take a "shower". He actually says "shower" every time he hears the water running. So the partner takes out Rick's spray bottle and sprays him down. The bird is loving this, flapping his wings and getting all kissy-lovey.
When done, the bird is soaking wet, his feathers are so "scrinkled" (?) that you can see clear down to his skin. At this point, you realize just how weird a bird looks - they have the strangest little bodies, with the scrawniest of necks.
At this point, the bird is all happy and giving us kisses and spending long amounts of time preening his feathers getting all nice and "pretty" (he also says "what a PRETTY bird" into the mirror). So I walk up to him and he puts his head down to let me kiss the top of it, which he loves. And he quietly says "I love you".
And I smile.
Ok, so it has been a while since I wrote about "the Bird". But here is a cute story.
Last night, "the partner" decided that the Bird needed a shower. He decided this because Rick has this habit of going for a bath in his water bowl and making a real mess. The bird loves to get wet and take a "shower". He actually says "shower" every time he hears the water running. So the partner takes out Rick's spray bottle and sprays him down. The bird is loving this, flapping his wings and getting all kissy-lovey.
When done, the bird is soaking wet, his feathers are so "scrinkled" (?) that you can see clear down to his skin. At this point, you realize just how weird a bird looks - they have the strangest little bodies, with the scrawniest of necks.
At this point, the bird is all happy and giving us kisses and spending long amounts of time preening his feathers getting all nice and "pretty" (he also says "what a PRETTY bird" into the mirror). So I walk up to him and he puts his head down to let me kiss the top of it, which he loves. And he quietly says "I love you".
And I smile.
Sunday, December 04, 2005
Well, this sucks
My favorite line from the movie "Madagascar" is the very end. The penguins, who mastermind the whole escape from the NY zoo so they can finally get home to Antarctica (a place they have never seen), finally make it to Antarctica and with howling snow and wind, one turns to the others and says, "well this sucks". Marvelous.
Today, I have a similar feeling. Snow has returned, and well, it sucks. Last spring, some birds built a big old nest in the yard next door, clearly visible from our bedroom window. We watched them move in, have some young, teach them to fly, then disappear when it got colder. Today, it sits alone and quite cold:
Oh well, "cycle of life" and blah, blah. At least it was a pretty picture out the window, first snow of the season and all. But let's not make it a habit.
Today, I have a similar feeling. Snow has returned, and well, it sucks. Last spring, some birds built a big old nest in the yard next door, clearly visible from our bedroom window. We watched them move in, have some young, teach them to fly, then disappear when it got colder. Today, it sits alone and quite cold:
Oh well, "cycle of life" and blah, blah. At least it was a pretty picture out the window, first snow of the season and all. But let's not make it a habit.
Friday, December 02, 2005
"Desperate Housewives" is nothing compared to "Knots"
"Knots Landing" had to be one of the best nighttime soaps ever - as they refer to it "the original 'Desperate Housewives'". But DW is nowhere near the League Knots was in. Tonight CBS remembers:
Jerk of the Week
Scott McClellan, White House Press Secretary and American Baghdad Bob, mouthpiece of Karl Rove and Dick Cheney.
Today he said it was "irresponsible" for democrats to criticize the White House plan for success in Iraq.
See Story
Hello!!!??? Does he live here? Has he (or anyone in the administration) studied the Bill of Rights? The Constitution? It is their duty to criticize our leadership to be certain we are being well led. And these days, we most certainly are not being well led.
I mean, isn't it for these same rights we are fighting in Iraq, to give them to the Iraqi people?
It is HIS irresponsible statement, with its echoes of Nazi Germany, that earns him "Jerk of the Week".
Today he said it was "irresponsible" for democrats to criticize the White House plan for success in Iraq.
See Story
Hello!!!??? Does he live here? Has he (or anyone in the administration) studied the Bill of Rights? The Constitution? It is their duty to criticize our leadership to be certain we are being well led. And these days, we most certainly are not being well led.
I mean, isn't it for these same rights we are fighting in Iraq, to give them to the Iraqi people?
It is HIS irresponsible statement, with its echoes of Nazi Germany, that earns him "Jerk of the Week".
It sounds like Hollywood
This story is great - Disney could do it justice, even if it has been done before:
http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/12/01/emily.cat.ap/index.html
http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/12/01/emily.cat.ap/index.html
Wednesday, November 30, 2005
Sunday, November 27, 2005
Happy Birthday Jen
One of my best friends turned the Big 4-0 today. I am right behind her. Happy Birthday Sweetie! Q'apla! I will have a goblet of Trania for you tonight.
Amazon.Com, I love you
Where were we before the internet existed? How did we survive without email? Online shopping?
Between last night and this afternoon, I was able to finish 80 percent of my total holiday shopping. And this stuff was not crappy last minute decisions - they were well thought out choices. Why? Because the online stores are getting so sophisticated and organized, they can help you funnel through ideas until you find a reasonable number of options to select from.
Amazon.Com's "Gift Ideas", where you can find choices organized by type of person, interest, price range, etc - helped me save loads of time. Same thing with Gap.Com. You do not get this simple tool when you walk into a store - you just get sheer frustration looking at tons and tons of things. Mostly useless things.
And to think that only a few years ago I would drive to stores, fight for parking, run through cold and snow, fight with fellow shoppers. No more. Amazon saved me from that.
Not that I will totally live in a cave and never go out again, I still have to shop for some small items, and for supplies (cards, paper, etc), but now I will not feel as pressured - I can enjoy the season.
Between last night and this afternoon, I was able to finish 80 percent of my total holiday shopping. And this stuff was not crappy last minute decisions - they were well thought out choices. Why? Because the online stores are getting so sophisticated and organized, they can help you funnel through ideas until you find a reasonable number of options to select from.
Amazon.Com's "Gift Ideas", where you can find choices organized by type of person, interest, price range, etc - helped me save loads of time. Same thing with Gap.Com. You do not get this simple tool when you walk into a store - you just get sheer frustration looking at tons and tons of things. Mostly useless things.
And to think that only a few years ago I would drive to stores, fight for parking, run through cold and snow, fight with fellow shoppers. No more. Amazon saved me from that.
Not that I will totally live in a cave and never go out again, I still have to shop for some small items, and for supplies (cards, paper, etc), but now I will not feel as pressured - I can enjoy the season.
Saturday, November 26, 2005
World War II Nostalgia, Part 2
Continuing my story about my school day travels in Europe and my fact finding mission regarding World War II, eventually I made my way to communist East Germany.
Many of you do not remember East Germany, the "German Democractic Republic" (which was anything but). But I was there, and was baptized in Soviet communism during the waning days of the cold war. Reagan and Gorbachev were meeting in Iceland about improving relations, I was intimidated by statues of Lenin and crazy goose-stepping East German police.
The first day was spent in East Berlin, shopping for contraband I would later "smuggle" back to West Berlin (so cloak and dagger - NOT), and eating huge meals for a dollar. One thing you have to say about communism, everything is cheap. Of course so is the pay. And the beer bottles are all reused, and not very well cleaned.
I tried to engage some people in conversation. The older people seemed uninterested and possibly even nervous about talking to Americans. However, the younger people - high school age - were very interested. They wanted to know everything I could tell them about American culture (which is when I realized I know very little) and interestingly, they wanted to know about their West German counterparts.
The second day I was heading out to a cemetery full of fallen Soviet soldiers from the war. This was supposed to be high holy ground in communist Germany, where the Soviet heroes were laid to rest after giving their lives liberating the Germans from Nazi oppression. Of course, no one disputes that Germans are better off without the Nazis, West Germany showed that. But in East Germany, Soviet oppression was clearly pretty bad in and of itself.
But back to the cemetery. The place was lined with hammer and sickle, and in the middle was this giant statue of this mega Soviet soldier crushing the swastika under his feet. The symbol was powerful. Despite my negative feelings about Soviet Germany, it is important how much the Soviets suffered fighting Hitler. This giant reminder sitting right outside the former Nazi capital was very moving.
I returned to the West through a subway that only Westerners could take back to "Check Point Charlie" to cross the Berlin Wall to the American controlled part of West Berlin. No East Germans could go back that way, they were forbidden from going to the west.
Back then, during the mid 1980's, I was asked if I thought the two Germanys would reunite and I said steadfastly "No". Only five years later they were bringing the wall down.
Many of you do not remember East Germany, the "German Democractic Republic" (which was anything but). But I was there, and was baptized in Soviet communism during the waning days of the cold war. Reagan and Gorbachev were meeting in Iceland about improving relations, I was intimidated by statues of Lenin and crazy goose-stepping East German police.
The first day was spent in East Berlin, shopping for contraband I would later "smuggle" back to West Berlin (so cloak and dagger - NOT), and eating huge meals for a dollar. One thing you have to say about communism, everything is cheap. Of course so is the pay. And the beer bottles are all reused, and not very well cleaned.
I tried to engage some people in conversation. The older people seemed uninterested and possibly even nervous about talking to Americans. However, the younger people - high school age - were very interested. They wanted to know everything I could tell them about American culture (which is when I realized I know very little) and interestingly, they wanted to know about their West German counterparts.
The second day I was heading out to a cemetery full of fallen Soviet soldiers from the war. This was supposed to be high holy ground in communist Germany, where the Soviet heroes were laid to rest after giving their lives liberating the Germans from Nazi oppression. Of course, no one disputes that Germans are better off without the Nazis, West Germany showed that. But in East Germany, Soviet oppression was clearly pretty bad in and of itself.
But back to the cemetery. The place was lined with hammer and sickle, and in the middle was this giant statue of this mega Soviet soldier crushing the swastika under his feet. The symbol was powerful. Despite my negative feelings about Soviet Germany, it is important how much the Soviets suffered fighting Hitler. This giant reminder sitting right outside the former Nazi capital was very moving.
I returned to the West through a subway that only Westerners could take back to "Check Point Charlie" to cross the Berlin Wall to the American controlled part of West Berlin. No East Germans could go back that way, they were forbidden from going to the west.
Back then, during the mid 1980's, I was asked if I thought the two Germanys would reunite and I said steadfastly "No". Only five years later they were bringing the wall down.
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
What I am thankful for - 2005
In keeping with the theme of the "Festival of Gratitude", I am hereby thankful for the following things in 2005:
- I am thankful my youngest brother successfully completed two tours of duty with the Marines in Iraq, and that he has since left the Marines and is going to college, where he will be very successful.
- I am thankful that I have such a great group of friends to support me when I need it, especially Jen, Keri, Brad, Sue, Jeff, Erica, Bill, Mike, Amy, Maryjane, Christine, Shelly, Pam and Toni - I love being with any one or all of them at any given time.
- I am thankful that the American people are seeing the light and beginning to realize they elected a Total Boob into office in 2004 (I refuse to use the term "re-elected"). I can only hope that we can save face with the rest of the world in time.
- I am thankful that I successfully quit smoking (going on 1.5 years now) and that I appear to have no interest in starting again.
- I am thankful that gas prices came back down, as I am starting to commute in December and well, jeez.
- I am thankful that I have so many things to be thankful for.
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
I want to hate this show, but can't
"Prison Break" (Fox, Mondays at 9 pm) is exactly the type of show that someone like me should not ever watch. It is intriguing, well written, has a great cast and most importantly keeps you spell bound from week to week.
The cast of "Prison Break" gathers weekly to annoy/intrigue me
The last thing I need in my life is another intriguing show that forces me to give up some time to watch it every week. What with "Amazing Race", "Lost", "Invasion", "Survivor", "Battlestar Galactica" - not to mention the not so regular "Sopranos", "the 4400" - there are just TOO MANY shows! Thankfully "24" is not on until January and "Prison Break" will go on hiatus until the late spring.
"Prison Break" is not a show I would normally like. It involves prison (boring), a vice president (boring), lawyers (yawn) battling evil secret service (been there, done that), and a rebellious youngster (oh, there is something new). It also features no one character that is interesting in any way. I feel no sympathy for any of them individually (and despise several, who may or may not be killed off - one can only hope). When each single aspect of the story is examined alone, every one of them is blah - but somehow, when the whole thing comes together, it gets you hooked.
And some of it is just outright ridiculous. I mean, who makes a Taj Mahal out of matchsticks to give their wife for an anniversary present?
It is almost like an addiction to crack. You know you should not watch it, you do not want to watch it, but you can't stop watching it.
The cast of "Prison Break" gathers weekly to annoy/intrigue me
The last thing I need in my life is another intriguing show that forces me to give up some time to watch it every week. What with "Amazing Race", "Lost", "Invasion", "Survivor", "Battlestar Galactica" - not to mention the not so regular "Sopranos", "the 4400" - there are just TOO MANY shows! Thankfully "24" is not on until January and "Prison Break" will go on hiatus until the late spring.
"Prison Break" is not a show I would normally like. It involves prison (boring), a vice president (boring), lawyers (yawn) battling evil secret service (been there, done that), and a rebellious youngster (oh, there is something new). It also features no one character that is interesting in any way. I feel no sympathy for any of them individually (and despise several, who may or may not be killed off - one can only hope). When each single aspect of the story is examined alone, every one of them is blah - but somehow, when the whole thing comes together, it gets you hooked.
And some of it is just outright ridiculous. I mean, who makes a Taj Mahal out of matchsticks to give their wife for an anniversary present?
It is almost like an addiction to crack. You know you should not watch it, you do not want to watch it, but you can't stop watching it.
World War II Nostalgia, Part 1
I recently revisited the mini-series "Winds of War" and "War and Remembrance" and remembered how much I loved these stories - how they told a fictional story so well against the details of history. It made me nostalgic for some time I spent in Europe as a student of Political Science.
I went to Germany in High School and then to university there at Freiburg in Breisgau in 1986-87. During that time, I did a lot of traveling through Europe, even across the Iron Curtain, which is now just a memory. I am a huge history buff and this opportunity was wonderful.
I was always fascinated by European History and WWII in particular. The history is so filled with drama, tension, heroism and horrors, you just can't make it up - it is so incredibly real. And the emotions remain strong. I remember a time visiting a flea market in France near Mulhouse, when I came across some silver ware with Nazi markings. I was at this flea market with a German friend of mine. I showed him the silver ware and remarked that I found it interesting. He was annoyed and told me to put it down. I asked him later why he was so upset and he remarked that the items were stolen off "dead German soldiers by the French" and should not be sold like that at the flea market.
I was floored. Here was this very modern guy who had no love of the Nazi past, but who was still somewhat moved when presented with this artifact. Personally, it seemed to me that the French had every right to take it from their invading enemy.
I would find out later that my friend felt very uncomfortable about all things Nazi. It turns out that his grandfather was a Nazi party member and had been taken prisoner by the Russians. His grandmother and father were bombed out of their homes by the Americans in late 1944. They were not reunited until almost 1949, when the Soviets finally released the remaining German POWs.
My friend was sensitive to the entire subject. I want to stress that he and his family were in no way Nazi sympathizers, but the war left scars on his family and that was clear even 40 years later. He did eventually allow me to meet with his grandparents and talk about their experiences. It was fascinating to hear first hand what they experienced. And they treated me with great respect, and even seemed very thrilled to have a willing listener. His father was also interesting to talk with, he was very young when the Americans occupied their city, but he clearly remembered American soldiers treating the children very well, and even giving them candy.
Getting this perspective was a very unique experience. And what it really drove home to me was the fact that we are all the same, no matter where we live on this Earth. At that time, we were still in the midst of the Cold War, and I was off to East Germany and Czechoslovakia. I wanted to prove to myself that this same feeling could be found there, a place where I had been propaganda-ed since birth to believe is my enemy.
More on that experience later....
I went to Germany in High School and then to university there at Freiburg in Breisgau in 1986-87. During that time, I did a lot of traveling through Europe, even across the Iron Curtain, which is now just a memory. I am a huge history buff and this opportunity was wonderful.
I was always fascinated by European History and WWII in particular. The history is so filled with drama, tension, heroism and horrors, you just can't make it up - it is so incredibly real. And the emotions remain strong. I remember a time visiting a flea market in France near Mulhouse, when I came across some silver ware with Nazi markings. I was at this flea market with a German friend of mine. I showed him the silver ware and remarked that I found it interesting. He was annoyed and told me to put it down. I asked him later why he was so upset and he remarked that the items were stolen off "dead German soldiers by the French" and should not be sold like that at the flea market.
I was floored. Here was this very modern guy who had no love of the Nazi past, but who was still somewhat moved when presented with this artifact. Personally, it seemed to me that the French had every right to take it from their invading enemy.
I would find out later that my friend felt very uncomfortable about all things Nazi. It turns out that his grandfather was a Nazi party member and had been taken prisoner by the Russians. His grandmother and father were bombed out of their homes by the Americans in late 1944. They were not reunited until almost 1949, when the Soviets finally released the remaining German POWs.
My friend was sensitive to the entire subject. I want to stress that he and his family were in no way Nazi sympathizers, but the war left scars on his family and that was clear even 40 years later. He did eventually allow me to meet with his grandparents and talk about their experiences. It was fascinating to hear first hand what they experienced. And they treated me with great respect, and even seemed very thrilled to have a willing listener. His father was also interesting to talk with, he was very young when the Americans occupied their city, but he clearly remembered American soldiers treating the children very well, and even giving them candy.
Getting this perspective was a very unique experience. And what it really drove home to me was the fact that we are all the same, no matter where we live on this Earth. At that time, we were still in the midst of the Cold War, and I was off to East Germany and Czechoslovakia. I wanted to prove to myself that this same feeling could be found there, a place where I had been propaganda-ed since birth to believe is my enemy.
More on that experience later....
Monday, November 21, 2005
Gym Pet Peeve
Generally it seems like common courtesy at the gym to wipe your sweaty residue off a machine when you are done with it. In fact, there is a sign that requests it. Another common courtesy (and accompanying sign) request that you do not hog the machines when others are waiting to use them (in other words, if you are doing multiple sets, let another member cut in who is working through).
Most of the time this is not a problem - most people seem to see the sense/consideration in observing these rules. However, there is this one guy where I work out who seems to act like no one else is there. He does multiple sets without giving up the machine, reading his People magazine while resting, comfortably, on the machine. He gives annoyed glances to people who are clearly waiting. And then when he is finally ready to give up the machine, he does not wipe it off.
So now I am wondering how to approach this guy. I don't generally want to create conflict and if this only happened sporadically, I would ignore it. But it happens all the time - and for some reason our schedules seem to overlap.
Some people are just so damned inconsiderate.
Most of the time this is not a problem - most people seem to see the sense/consideration in observing these rules. However, there is this one guy where I work out who seems to act like no one else is there. He does multiple sets without giving up the machine, reading his People magazine while resting, comfortably, on the machine. He gives annoyed glances to people who are clearly waiting. And then when he is finally ready to give up the machine, he does not wipe it off.
So now I am wondering how to approach this guy. I don't generally want to create conflict and if this only happened sporadically, I would ignore it. But it happens all the time - and for some reason our schedules seem to overlap.
Some people are just so damned inconsiderate.
Sunday, November 20, 2005
"Harry Potter" keeps it up
I have to confess that I am an adult fan of the Harry Potter series, and have therefore already seen the new film "Goblet of Fire". It was great.
But I was a hesitant Potter fan. During the summer of 2001, when the "Goblet of Fire" was being released as a book for the first time, I knew very little about Potter. Of course, I had heard of the series. My brother had given me the first book, the "Sorcerer's Stone" for Christmas two years before it. He was adamant that I would like it but I kept thinking "this is a kid's story" and kept the book on the shelf.
Then during that summer (2001), with all the hype of the new book and the first film coming out, my interest was peaked when I read an article about the movie in Newsweek. I took the book off the shelf and decided to trust my brother's good judgment. And he was right, I loved it. I read the whole book within one full day.
I held off reading the other books until the first movie came out. Then I ate the other books for dinner for the next few weeks. I was caught in its charming net - hook, line and sinker.
As for the movies, they do lack much of JK Rowling's magic from the books - however she does it, she is a literary master. But the movies' directors to this point have been very good at keeping the abridged stories focused on what matters, and watching the visualization of the story is inspiring - it brings out the child in me a little bit each time.
So go see it - but beware - as with the books, the films get darker and more disturbing with each outing - and this one is no different.
But I was a hesitant Potter fan. During the summer of 2001, when the "Goblet of Fire" was being released as a book for the first time, I knew very little about Potter. Of course, I had heard of the series. My brother had given me the first book, the "Sorcerer's Stone" for Christmas two years before it. He was adamant that I would like it but I kept thinking "this is a kid's story" and kept the book on the shelf.
Then during that summer (2001), with all the hype of the new book and the first film coming out, my interest was peaked when I read an article about the movie in Newsweek. I took the book off the shelf and decided to trust my brother's good judgment. And he was right, I loved it. I read the whole book within one full day.
I held off reading the other books until the first movie came out. Then I ate the other books for dinner for the next few weeks. I was caught in its charming net - hook, line and sinker.
As for the movies, they do lack much of JK Rowling's magic from the books - however she does it, she is a literary master. But the movies' directors to this point have been very good at keeping the abridged stories focused on what matters, and watching the visualization of the story is inspiring - it brings out the child in me a little bit each time.
So go see it - but beware - as with the books, the films get darker and more disturbing with each outing - and this one is no different.
Friday, November 18, 2005
Masters of Mis-Information
UPDATE - 11/18/2005 - Truly Unbelieveable
Why does he.....
remind me so much of.....
????
I'm just asking.
Why does he.....
remind me so much of.....
????I'm just asking.
The Bird and His Hole
We are in the middle of doing some major work in our home. One of the things involved is a wall cut down in half. The bird is always getting himself into little nooks and crannies (it is in their nature to "burrow" into small places and nest). So this morning he has discovered the top of this new half wall, which is not even topped off yet, and sees these holes. I think he has found a new perch:
So why do they say ostriches stick their heads in holes?
So why do they say ostriches stick their heads in holes?
Thursday, November 17, 2005
Out of Area
WTF does "Out of Area" mean on the Caller ID? There is this one freakin' call I get almost every day between 6-7 pm where the caller ID says that, and if I do not answer there is no message left. I got so annoyed last night that I picked it up to say "HELLO!!!!" but there was no one there?
Ugh!
Ugh!
Thank you, MBTA!
For finally re-opening the Green Line from North Station to Lechmere. That 20 month paint job really looks good.
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
Parking Garage
I just came back from doing some lunch time shopping and I am highly annoyed. In the line to get out of the parking garage, it seemed that every driver in front of me had to give their ticket, then wait for the attendant to tell them how much it was and THEN begin looking for their money.
You know, with all the time sitting and waiting, they could not have their money out? I mean come on. I think there should be a time limit and big sign, "Anyone who takes more than ten seconds to produce parking fee will pay full day rate". In fact, it should not be a sign, it should be a law. In fact, it should not just apply to lines at parking garages, but at anything where lines and cash production are working together.
Why does everyone else seem to have so much time?
You know, with all the time sitting and waiting, they could not have their money out? I mean come on. I think there should be a time limit and big sign, "Anyone who takes more than ten seconds to produce parking fee will pay full day rate". In fact, it should not be a sign, it should be a law. In fact, it should not just apply to lines at parking garages, but at anything where lines and cash production are working together.
Why does everyone else seem to have so much time?
Attention Office Mates
To avoid a BioHazard Event of nightmarish proportions, as well as to alleviate general nastiness and fend off a stench that is threatening overtake my very work area, the fridges were purged of all "leftovers" and plastic bags of whatever it is you keep in them.
I was conservative and threw away only what was obviously bad: Hairy cheese, liquidic salad (apparently a theme here), baked ziti that had morphed into a brown gelatinous mass (forensic pathology helped identify ziti as the substance of origin - the Tupperware container it was in is recuperating at MGH and currently listed in stable condition), anything (whether sealed or not) with expiration dates from the 20th century, sandwiches with crust (not the bread), or anything just generally foul in nature.
Office Manager
Tivo/DVR - Blessing or Curse?
I have had a cable DVR box (like Tivo) going on about 4 months now. I was motivated to get this based on all the good things I hear about Tivo, and wanting to watch "General Hospital" every day. Because DVR also records things at the same time you watch something else, it was a good tool to avoid conflict with "the partner" about what we would watch.
At first, I was so delighted. I could watch shows whenever I wanted, and did not have to schedule my life around "Lost" or "24" - I could actually miss one or two and catch up later.
That, though, is the problem. Sometimes I end up with such a backlog of shows to watch that I just end up deleting them feeling overwelmed, which basically defeats the purpose of having the thing to begin with.
So technology continues to be both friend and foe.
At first, I was so delighted. I could watch shows whenever I wanted, and did not have to schedule my life around "Lost" or "24" - I could actually miss one or two and catch up later.
That, though, is the problem. Sometimes I end up with such a backlog of shows to watch that I just end up deleting them feeling overwelmed, which basically defeats the purpose of having the thing to begin with.
So technology continues to be both friend and foe.
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Jerk of the Week
Brian Camenker, head of the anti-gay group Article 8 Alliance:
He appeared on the Daily Show where he was asked about how gay marriage in Massachusetts would cause the state to fall apart, leading to all kinds of horrors. Of course, the question was a joke, designed to mock him, but he did not get it. He claimed that given the time and doing the research, he could prove that gay marriage leads to homelessness, crime, etc. This earns him "Jerk of the Week", beating out Pat Robertson and Bill O'Reilly.
This article in Bay Windows tells the whole story. I bet the actual interview was a hoot.
Gay marriage has been legal in Massachusetts now for over a year. The state is still here and we have not been swallowed up by the depths of hell. In fact, people seem just a tad bit happier and nicer to each other. Support to amend the state constitution to ban gay marriage is waning.
Hey and guess what else? Look at crime statistics, poverty statistics, divorce statistics for the state of Massachusetts, and compare them to those Red States that have actually put discrimination in their constitutions. Guess which state has the better stats?
He appeared on the Daily Show where he was asked about how gay marriage in Massachusetts would cause the state to fall apart, leading to all kinds of horrors. Of course, the question was a joke, designed to mock him, but he did not get it. He claimed that given the time and doing the research, he could prove that gay marriage leads to homelessness, crime, etc. This earns him "Jerk of the Week", beating out Pat Robertson and Bill O'Reilly.
This article in Bay Windows tells the whole story. I bet the actual interview was a hoot.
Gay marriage has been legal in Massachusetts now for over a year. The state is still here and we have not been swallowed up by the depths of hell. In fact, people seem just a tad bit happier and nicer to each other. Support to amend the state constitution to ban gay marriage is waning.
Hey and guess what else? Look at crime statistics, poverty statistics, divorce statistics for the state of Massachusetts, and compare them to those Red States that have actually put discrimination in their constitutions. Guess which state has the better stats?
Driving Manners
Directionals - What the hell is so hard about using directionals (blinkers) for some people when they are driving? Why does it seem like some people simply will not use them? I seem to recall during driving school (years and years ago) that this was a required action. Has this changed in Massachusetts during the past 25(ish) years? I am not asking people to use the hand signals, just the standard right on the dash controlled blinkers.
On a related note, all vehicles should be designed that when the blinker is left "blinking" for an inordinate amount of time without actually changing direction, the vehicle sends an electric shock of massive proportions to the driver through the steering wheel.
Stop Signs - All of the stop signs that I have seen have the word STOP in the middle of them. Stop, as I recall it from first grade vocabulary means to "cease movement", not "slow down a little and then move faster. Look, I am not being a prude, I believe there are way too many stop signs to begin with, but come on people.
Similar situation with traffic signals. One question - does "left turn on red" really exist? Anyone? Anyone?
Double Parkers - Although double parking is a necessary evil in the city, it is so abused in so many places (especially in Boston) that it must be done away with. I propose that vehicles are built with extra body armor and forward mounted rocket launchers. This way, you fire your rockets at the double parkers causing their vehicle to be obliterated in a massive fireball. Then, the body armor allows you to drive through the fiery wreckage ala "The Terminator". This is a practical approach to the eventual elimination of double parking.
Jay-walkers - In Massachusetts, we have this irritating, but sensible law that says you must "stop for pedestrians in cross-walks". It specifically says "cross-walks". Therefore, jay-walkers proceed at their own risk. Personally, anyone who meanders across the street in a non-cross walk area is a jerk and should be fined. Fines are doubled if they are actually encouraging their children to do the same.
Letting people "Go" - OK, so we are all stuck sometimes in these horrible traffic jam machines like the approach to the Sumner Tunnel from Logan Airport, where ten lanes of traffic merge into two. You know, you have to let some people get in front of you sometimes, it just has to happen. The people who stubbornly refuse to let people go, are pure asses. Period. Personally, it seems you should let someone go, then someone lets you go, etc. This just makes sense.
I'm just saying....
On a related note, all vehicles should be designed that when the blinker is left "blinking" for an inordinate amount of time without actually changing direction, the vehicle sends an electric shock of massive proportions to the driver through the steering wheel.
Stop Signs - All of the stop signs that I have seen have the word STOP in the middle of them. Stop, as I recall it from first grade vocabulary means to "cease movement", not "slow down a little and then move faster. Look, I am not being a prude, I believe there are way too many stop signs to begin with, but come on people.
Similar situation with traffic signals. One question - does "left turn on red" really exist? Anyone? Anyone?
Double Parkers - Although double parking is a necessary evil in the city, it is so abused in so many places (especially in Boston) that it must be done away with. I propose that vehicles are built with extra body armor and forward mounted rocket launchers. This way, you fire your rockets at the double parkers causing their vehicle to be obliterated in a massive fireball. Then, the body armor allows you to drive through the fiery wreckage ala "The Terminator". This is a practical approach to the eventual elimination of double parking.
Jay-walkers - In Massachusetts, we have this irritating, but sensible law that says you must "stop for pedestrians in cross-walks". It specifically says "cross-walks". Therefore, jay-walkers proceed at their own risk. Personally, anyone who meanders across the street in a non-cross walk area is a jerk and should be fined. Fines are doubled if they are actually encouraging their children to do the same.
Letting people "Go" - OK, so we are all stuck sometimes in these horrible traffic jam machines like the approach to the Sumner Tunnel from Logan Airport, where ten lanes of traffic merge into two. You know, you have to let some people get in front of you sometimes, it just has to happen. The people who stubbornly refuse to let people go, are pure asses. Period. Personally, it seems you should let someone go, then someone lets you go, etc. This just makes sense.
I'm just saying....
Monday, November 14, 2005
Gayness Test
To determine potential gayness (ie - "highly gay", "semi-gay", "non-gay") answer the following questions and give yourself 1 point for every "Yes" response:
1. Are you male?
2. Do you enjoy drinking a wine simply to experience and discuss its flavor, and not to get drunk?
3. Do you think Julia Roberts is "so over".
4. Do you watch 2 or more programs on the WB?
5. Do you actually take the time to try on clothing while shopping?
6. Does it take you more than 15 minutes to select one greeting card?
Add up your "Yes" responses and determine gayness based on the following Queerness Scale:
4-6 points = "Highly gay" ("extremely" if you get 6, if you got more than 6, re-check your math)
2-3 points = "Semi-gay" (3 can equal "Meterosexual" or "confused").
0-1 points = "Non-gay" (0 = neo-nazi, or member of Bush administration)
Total Bummer
"Arrested Development" is one of the best TV shows ever. And therefore, it is being canceled.
"Arrested Development" is canceled half way through its third season, far too early.
It is incredibly well written, perfectly acted and incredibly funny. The only thing that I can hope is that it might get picked up by some cable channel? I'll have to get the DVDs - these shows can be watched over and over and still be funny.
I will miss this show a lot, it is rare a good show getting canceled bothers me that much, but this is one time it does.
"Arrested Development" is canceled half way through its third season, far too early.
It is incredibly well written, perfectly acted and incredibly funny. The only thing that I can hope is that it might get picked up by some cable channel? I'll have to get the DVDs - these shows can be watched over and over and still be funny.
I will miss this show a lot, it is rare a good show getting canceled bothers me that much, but this is one time it does.
Sunday, November 13, 2005
"Political Capital"
When George Bush was "re-elected" in November, 2004, he arrogantly claimed that the election had earned him "political capital" and that he was going to spend it. His partners in crime claimed he had earned this "mandate" somehow, with only 51% of the votes. And they also ignorantly claimed the election showed that America was not split after all (ah, hello?).
An incompetent Boob claims some "capital"
So now he has sunk in all the polls that can possibly be polled - every aspect of leadership, of direction his country is moving in, the decisions he (and others?) have made. It appears that he greatly overestimated his "political capital".
He claimed on Friday that his critics are "re-writing the history of the Iraq war", when in reality, it is he and his groupies that are doing that, and appear to be rehashing old speeches to try and get his numbers moving upwards again.
What does all this basically tell us about our Leader, our Commander in Chief? Well, it simply shows how completely out of touch with reality and the desires of the American people he is. Americans do not want to go to war just to "spread freedom", and that is not the reason we went to war in Iraq. How dare HE claim that people are re-writing history? How dare he claim that criticizing the war actually endangers the freedoms he claims to want to protect? It is that very freedom that challenges us to question our leaders. Between the Patriot Act and his own actions, he appears more interested in curbing our freedoms, not protecting them.
The man is living in a fog, one that was created by the traitor Karl Rove and then perpetuated by people like Cheney and Condoleeza Rice. One can only hope that we can survive the next three years with our credibility as a leading democracy in tact and clear house.
An incompetent Boob claims some "capital"
So now he has sunk in all the polls that can possibly be polled - every aspect of leadership, of direction his country is moving in, the decisions he (and others?) have made. It appears that he greatly overestimated his "political capital".
He claimed on Friday that his critics are "re-writing the history of the Iraq war", when in reality, it is he and his groupies that are doing that, and appear to be rehashing old speeches to try and get his numbers moving upwards again.
What does all this basically tell us about our Leader, our Commander in Chief? Well, it simply shows how completely out of touch with reality and the desires of the American people he is. Americans do not want to go to war just to "spread freedom", and that is not the reason we went to war in Iraq. How dare HE claim that people are re-writing history? How dare he claim that criticizing the war actually endangers the freedoms he claims to want to protect? It is that very freedom that challenges us to question our leaders. Between the Patriot Act and his own actions, he appears more interested in curbing our freedoms, not protecting them.
The man is living in a fog, one that was created by the traitor Karl Rove and then perpetuated by people like Cheney and Condoleeza Rice. One can only hope that we can survive the next three years with our credibility as a leading democracy in tact and clear house.
Saturday, November 12, 2005
Being Fabulous
Last night I met two of my closest friends at the trendy Boston hot spot "Bonfire" for one reason - to be "fabulous".
Being fabulous is more than a way of being, it is a way of thinking. To be perfectly fabulous, you need to dress and act the part. No jeans in fabulous. Proper attire is required. Also, exotic cocktails in fancy glasses - no beers.
There should be a certain level of pretention about the atmosphere - an "on top of the world" way of it. Also, you must casually act as though you are one of that elusive 1% of society that controls 75% of wealth and power.
I wore business casual, no tie but nice jacket and slacks. The "no tie" approach says, "look at me, I throw caution to the wind". I wanted to bring a pipe, but since I have quit smoking, the only suitable one was one that blew bubbles - I decided that was not right for the look.
My two fabulous friends, Jen and Keri, looked "mahvelous, dahling" - and were very willing accomplices in the act of being fabulous.
All kidding aside, we had a great time - I always do with them. And "Bonfire" is a wonderful restaurant, check it out here. They serve the best kind of wine, the type that comes in huge, completely full goblets. Lovely. Three goblets into the mission I was feeling very happy.
Needless to say, I love my friends, and I love being Fabulous with them.
Being fabulous is more than a way of being, it is a way of thinking. To be perfectly fabulous, you need to dress and act the part. No jeans in fabulous. Proper attire is required. Also, exotic cocktails in fancy glasses - no beers.
There should be a certain level of pretention about the atmosphere - an "on top of the world" way of it. Also, you must casually act as though you are one of that elusive 1% of society that controls 75% of wealth and power.
I wore business casual, no tie but nice jacket and slacks. The "no tie" approach says, "look at me, I throw caution to the wind". I wanted to bring a pipe, but since I have quit smoking, the only suitable one was one that blew bubbles - I decided that was not right for the look.
My two fabulous friends, Jen and Keri, looked "mahvelous, dahling" - and were very willing accomplices in the act of being fabulous.
All kidding aside, we had a great time - I always do with them. And "Bonfire" is a wonderful restaurant, check it out here. They serve the best kind of wine, the type that comes in huge, completely full goblets. Lovely. Three goblets into the mission I was feeling very happy.
Needless to say, I love my friends, and I love being Fabulous with them.
Thursday, November 10, 2005
I voted, and it scared me
On Tuesday there was one of those under appreciated "off year" elections. Sometimes I think most people do not even know these elections are happening. However, being someone who has always taken the right to vote seriously, I dutifully showed up to fill out my form.
What bothered me was that I was never asked to produce identification. I was asked who I was and where I lived, given the form and a pen and told to fill it out and put it in the machine. I did not personally know the people working the polls, so how could they be sure I was who I said I was?
In this time where accusations of election fraud are volleyed back and forth like insults in British parliament, shouldn't there have been a little more scrutiny?
What bothered me was that I was never asked to produce identification. I was asked who I was and where I lived, given the form and a pen and told to fill it out and put it in the machine. I did not personally know the people working the polls, so how could they be sure I was who I said I was?
In this time where accusations of election fraud are volleyed back and forth like insults in British parliament, shouldn't there have been a little more scrutiny?
My faith in Americans is healing a bit
Sadly, my faith in Americans has taken a huge hit over the past few years, and particularly when they did the single most ill-advised thing by re-electing "He Who Must Not Be Named" to a job he never rightly acquired to begin with.
Maybe people were too scared to make a change during this new age of terrorism and the questionable war in Iraq. I personally believe the accusations of election fraud are accurate, but hold no hope we will ever know for sure.
But, it seems people are finally waking up:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9981177/
These poll numbers keep dropping and dropping. I suppose I should not be surprised, as this administration - one that supports torture, hires cronies with no experience into key positions of government, give hand-outs to the wealthy while sticking it to the poor and middle class - this administration could not possible keep the wool over America's eyes forever?
People are finally realizing the truth about this administration. Sadly it is a year too late, we are facing three more years of this disaster.
God Help Us.
Maybe people were too scared to make a change during this new age of terrorism and the questionable war in Iraq. I personally believe the accusations of election fraud are accurate, but hold no hope we will ever know for sure.
But, it seems people are finally waking up:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9981177/
These poll numbers keep dropping and dropping. I suppose I should not be surprised, as this administration - one that supports torture, hires cronies with no experience into key positions of government, give hand-outs to the wealthy while sticking it to the poor and middle class - this administration could not possible keep the wool over America's eyes forever?
People are finally realizing the truth about this administration. Sadly it is a year too late, we are facing three more years of this disaster.
God Help Us.
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
Fenway Park Rocks
My good friend Jen, her partner Bill and I took a great tour of Fenway Park this year. If you are a Red Sox fan, you know that Fenway Park has special magic. Something you can only feel when you are actually inside its gates.
My fabulous friend Jen and I enjoy a day at the ball park
The Red Sox can be so frustrating. Last year, when the Yankees had us down 3-0 in the ALCS, my brother and I were lamenting the reasons for their horrid downfall. Ten days later we were celebrating their World Series victory.
Boston enjoyed a sports year like no other, World Series champs after 86 years, then Super Bowl champs again (three times in four years). Our teams could do no wrong. For 2005, the Red Sox did not repeat, but did not disappoint either. Their collapse towards the end is sad, but at least they made the post season. And it was nice to see the White Sox moving on to the same glory.
My fabulous friend Jen and I enjoy a day at the ball park
The Red Sox can be so frustrating. Last year, when the Yankees had us down 3-0 in the ALCS, my brother and I were lamenting the reasons for their horrid downfall. Ten days later we were celebrating their World Series victory.
Boston enjoyed a sports year like no other, World Series champs after 86 years, then Super Bowl champs again (three times in four years). Our teams could do no wrong. For 2005, the Red Sox did not repeat, but did not disappoint either. Their collapse towards the end is sad, but at least they made the post season. And it was nice to see the White Sox moving on to the same glory.
Sunday, October 30, 2005
Only 2 Bad Months
Today it was pretty obvious winter is coming, and that made me think about how to keep myself from falling into cold weather depression.
I try to think of it as that there are only two really bad weather months in Boston - the others all have redeeming qualities:
September and October - very pleasant, even though winter approacheth, real cold not quite there and very crisp, nice weather most of the time (except this year, I blame George Bush)
November - cold is still kind of "new" and "exciting" - you get to wear your cold weather stuff again (cozy sweaters, fluffy jackets), sit by a fire and drink cider.
December - the Holidays - who wants warm weather then? Let it snow.
January - this month sucks.
February - this month sucks.
March - although I would say this one sucks, it actually has a light at the end of the tunnel.
April - oh, the beauty of renewal, and IRS.
May - one of the nicest months (except for the hayfever).
June - oh, June
July - if I still felt patriotic, this would be my favorite month, but George Bush ruined that - still a good time for Provincetown!
August - more Provincetown!
So, if you can get through January and February, the rest of the year rocks in New England. And for those two months, just jet away!
I try to think of it as that there are only two really bad weather months in Boston - the others all have redeeming qualities:
September and October - very pleasant, even though winter approacheth, real cold not quite there and very crisp, nice weather most of the time (except this year, I blame George Bush)
November - cold is still kind of "new" and "exciting" - you get to wear your cold weather stuff again (cozy sweaters, fluffy jackets), sit by a fire and drink cider.
December - the Holidays - who wants warm weather then? Let it snow.
January - this month sucks.
February - this month sucks.
March - although I would say this one sucks, it actually has a light at the end of the tunnel.
April - oh, the beauty of renewal, and IRS.
May - one of the nicest months (except for the hayfever).
June - oh, June
July - if I still felt patriotic, this would be my favorite month, but George Bush ruined that - still a good time for Provincetown!
August - more Provincetown!
So, if you can get through January and February, the rest of the year rocks in New England. And for those two months, just jet away!
Saturday, October 29, 2005
Thursday, October 27, 2005
What A Bird
Before I can post anything to this blog, I need to tell you about who inspired it. He is Rick, my 30 year old African Gray Parrot. A bird? Yes, and not just any bird, but "what a bird". If you do not know the African Gray Parrot, it is one of the most talkative of the parrot world. It not only mimics you, but also your mannerisms, tone of voice, and even your voice itself. Plus, they have a 'tude. Rick, is a Tude Dude.
He talks up a storm into the mirror, apparently believing he is conversing with another bird. He squawks when he wants attention, screams if you do not give it to him, then kisses you when you do. He says "goodbye" in a sad way when I leave for work then comes running across the floor to meet me when I get home (like a dog) - and you have not seen anything until you see a parrot run across the floor to climb on your foot.
He is one of my greatest irritants, and my funniest friends. He says all kinds of things - a very extensive vocabulary he has learned over his long life. But of all the things he says, the one that amuses me the most is the one that is the title of this blog. You see, they listen to you carefully (you can see it in their eyes) and then one day, they start saying something new, and when they do, they don't stop.
Whenever he annoyed me, I would say "what a bird" in a condescending voice. One day, he suddenly started saying that, and not only saying it, but saying it in my voice, with my condescending tone. And when he learned it, it never stopped, he kept on saying it and it was the funniest thing ever.
Anyway, other than my beloved partner of 17 years, Rick is the most important "person" to me - he is my family, despite the feathers.
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